Why We Decided to Stay Digital for the First 3 Months
Why We Decided to Stay Digital for the First 3 Months
Blog Article
In the excitement of a new online connection, the immediate goal is often to meet in person as quickly as possible. It’s seen as the ultimate test of compatibility. But with Svetlana, whom I met on an international dating site, we made a conscious, deliberate decision to do the opposite. We decided not to meet for a full 90 days.
It wasn't due to a lack of interest. In fact, it was because our initial connection on https://www.sofiadate.com/ felt so strong that we wanted to protect it. We recognized that an early meeting, with all the expenses and pressures involved, could put undue stress on a budding romance. Instead, we decided to invest that time and energy into building an unshakeable foundation. We called it our "90-day digital courtship." We mapped out what this would look like, weighing the pros and cons.
| Aspect | Pros of a 90-Day Digital Period | Cons |
| Emotional Connection | Focus on deep communication, without physical distractions. | Risk of idealizing the partner. |
| Finances | Saving ~$1,500-$2,000 on flights and accommodation. | Delayed "real world" investment. |
| Pacing | Reduced pressure, allows relationship to develop organically. | May feel slow or not serious to some. |
| Conflict Resolution | Forced to use words to solve problems. | Unable to read non-verbal cues in conflict. |
| Expectations | Building realistic expectations based on personality, not chemistry. | Massive anticipation for the first meeting. |
During those three months, we became experts on each other. We had a standing "date night" every Friday via video call. We read the same book and discussed it. We took personality tests and compared results. We learned how to argue and resolve disagreements using only our words. We essentially did all the hard work of a relationship upfront. By the time the 90 days were over, we weren't heading into a first date filled with uncertainty. We were heading into a reunion with a person we already knew intimately and trusted completely. The wait didn't just delay our meeting; it magnified its meaning tenfold. Report this page